Keeping Up

The headline on Yahoo today has a story about how to spot whether your toddler is gifted or not and provided a list of things to look for to confirm that in fact your little one is better than most. The daily digest I receive from babycenter.com had a mom worried that her 11 month old wasn't "advanced enough" because "all" she can do is clap, wave, say momma and dadda and stand on her own. A few of the moms responded with links to websites where you can rundown a checklist to see how your baby fares compared to others. A few other moms posted comments assuring the mom that their kid was doing the same and not to worry, and a very few moms posted comments that indicated borderline disdain for evening trying to judge a baby like that. 

I have to say, I agree with the moms who were annoyed that anyone is even trying to judge whether their baby is "advanced enough". We aren't talking about a mom with a serious concern, like a one year old who cannot hold their head up or roll over, that would be cause for a visit to the pediatrician. It seems more like we are using our children as a way of keeping up with the Jones' and frankly, I find that really sad.

In these times of financial austerity though, where is a parent to turn when they want to beat their neighbors at a game of one-up-manship? When the credit cards are maxed and and hours at work are cut, the answer to showing off and making other people feel inferior can no longer be found in the brand new Toyota Minivan out front or the fancy swing set out back. With knock-off crocks a dime a dozen, you can hardly turn to fashion to brag either. And as babies are growing up and the diaper bags are becoming less crammed with stuff, the designer diaper bag is being left home more and more frequently. How then do we make other parents feel inferior?

With genius babies of course!! Why didn't I think of that? Well I suppose I must not have been much of genius baby myself, otherwise I'm sure the genius would have carried through to adulthood. I mean, obviously if a baby rolls over three weeks ahead of the average, he'll go on to Harvard Law and the Presidency, right? And if the little guy starts walking at 10 months he'll be lightyears ahead of his classmates at the magnet tech high school waiting for him 15 years down the road, right?

Or is it possible that maybe, just maybe, as long as a baby is developing, it's okay to let them do it at their own pace? Could it be that a baby who doesn't walk until 15 months is just as gifted as one who walked at 10 months? Can it be true that having a vocabulary of 3 words at 12 months doesn't make you any dumber than the baby who could say 7 words?

Life is hard enough folks. We know, we're the adults living everyday out in the world with the baggage we've been collecting all these long years. Let's try our best not to saddle our babies with baggage before they've even started pre-school. They'll roll over when they're ready, clap when they're ready, talk when they're ready, feed themselves when they're ready, and before we're ready we'll find they've grown up and we're longing for the days when they took those tentative first steps and stumbled into our arms with that look of pure joy that they felt mirrored back at them from our eyes.

Be proud, over-worried parents, your baby is "advanced enough". Below is a picture of my "advanced enough" baby kickin' it in his new reading chair.